Escape

Day and night, I struggle

Stuck in one of the hardest battles of all.

One day I’m helpless

In a never ending labyrinth,

Looking for something I can’t even comprehend.

Trying to make sense of where to go;

But still not knowing what to look for.

Running like there is no end.

The next day I’m trapped

In a small cage with tiny holes,

Getting away from a ghost I don’t even recognise.

Trying to make sense of where to hide;

But still not knowing what I’m hiding from.

Seeing things with my own, two eyes.

Claustrophobia creeps into my veins as 

I look for that giant exit sign.

Tell me how does one escape 

When one gets lost in their own mind?

      
-fin-

(featured image courtesy: pinterest)

Used

You craved for my company,

You said it would just take time;

So I waited.

      
You promised me soon you will reciprocate my feelings,

Despite breaking my heart in the process many times;

So I stayed.

      
But truth is you just liked the idea that I love you,

You just enjoyed the feeling of being loved;

So I felt used.

      
But you didn’t love me back,

Nor would you ever do;

So I got tired.

      
You just used my love for you,

Until it was all gone;

So I left.

     
-fin-

     

(featured image courtesy: trunkweed.com)

Guilty

From the lingering smell of a girl’s perfume on the collar of your shirt as I snuggle on your neck, I was supposed to feel the warmth of your embrace but I felt cold. Cold as if a bucket full of water with ice was poured on me, as I realised the perfume isn’t mine. It began. Was it a crime to accuse you all at once?
      

I thought it was so the benefit of doubt was the least I could give. But the constant ringing of your phone whenever you were with me and the hint of a smile from your lips as you opened the message told me this doesn’t seem like a text message you’ve received from one of your teammates. It continued. Would I sound like a lawyer if I interrogated you?

      

I didn’t want to sound like a lawyer so I let it pass. We never lied to each other but here was a thing I wouldn’t admit. There were times when I followed you wherever you go because of these aching accusations etched in my mind fuelled by your suspicious actions I couldn’t set aside. It escalated. Could I be sued for being a stalker of someone who was supposed to be the love of my life?

     

At this point I did not care anymore as I sketched an elaborate plan to confirm these suspicions that stopped me from having a peaceful sleep at night. Your actions kept me awake as I recalled the old-you whenever you were with me. I sulked more upon the realisation that you’ve never been this distant before. It led me to drastic measures and could you blame me when you, the supposed love of my life, drifted away as if an ocean is between us? It went out of control. Am I the suspect of this crime?

     

The answer was no. When one day we’re together, you told me you need to go. You brushed me off like dust when I asked and the conversation even heated when all I wanted to know was what was happening between us. You said we were fine but you know damn well we were far from that. The only right thing you did was to leave your phone when you walked out the door and there I saw the main evidence in this mystery I’ve been trying to solve. This last and most crucial clue brought me to the crime scene. I saw you kissing her. It ended. I knew I was the victim and I’m suing you for committing murder.

    

Now don’t you dare tell me that you are not a murderer; because you killed me the moment I saw you with her.

   

-fin-

(featured image courtesy: deviant art)

Walking Oxymoron

my mind a controlled chaos,

my heart an organised mess

beautifully painful are my emotions

i arguably acquiesce.

with my naturally strange company,

you’ll learn to deal with what life brings;

like the sad joys and sweet agonies,

with all the huge little things.

typically weird sometimes.

awfully good at acting natural.

i like small crowds in order to be myself

somehow, it is weirdly normal.

i’ve never told a lie, i am a liar.

i always busy myself with nothing.

i care deeply for humanity but

oftentimes, i loathe human beings.

my past experiences make me burn in tears,

i drown at the fire brought by

the aftermath of my unpleasant years.

so to protect myself, 

i hate to love and love to hate.

just same differences, they create.

     

-fin-

     

(featured image courtesy: pinterest)

Colours

You warned me anyway

Your favourite colour was black.

And you explain awhile back;

Just like your soul, you said.

But when I’m with you,

My cheeks so red.

‘LOVE,’ it is what they say;

No more of these thoughts so gray.

But then your soul came in the way.

Proving you weren’t here to stay.

The purple sky, I look up to

As you left me and my feelings so blue.

        

-fin-

     

(featured image courtesy of robertmills.me)

Gravity

And yes, it was a universal force,

Something natural, physical.

It occurs to anyone:

To you, me, whoever really.

And as Newton formulated,

what comes up must come down.

There I was up—way, way up

On Cloud Nine.

But just like the apple in the tree,

Not too long will my stay be.

So let it do the job.

Leave it to gravity;

‘Cause I’m actually not afraid to fall,

I’m just afraid you wouldn’t catch me.

 

-fin-

(photo courtesy of keyword-suggestion.com)

Surrender

When the body begins
To be swallowed by the dark abyss;

And the mind ends up

Being conquered by the beasts

Of the past which claw

Their way to the heart 

That strikes like a dart.

It starts 

To bleed like flowing tears.

Similar to what my eyes fear

They couldn’t stop.

Don’t blame me when

The odds made me give up.

(For I am tired.)

      

-fin-

(featured image courtesy of gaiaonline.com)

Love

no one realises

how powerful it is

until he or she

feels,

experiences,

or loses it.

      

it can either

make or break you,

that’s what love does.

strengthen

or shatter

one’s own heart.

        

but there are

indeed times like this,

where love could turn

one

into 

a writer.

          

there are others,

many others out there:

they tend to turn 

passion

into 

prose.

           

there are others,

many others like me:

they tend to turn

pain

into

poetry.

   

-fin-

(featured image courtesy of tumblr.com)

Done

I used to think you were the ying to my yang.

We were the Jekyll and Hyde; Tweedledee, Tweedledum.

But where were you? When I was on the brink, at the worst—

I was at the rock bottom down on my knees

saying, ‘please, please somebody out there be a dear, be a friend.’

I lent my shoulder for you to cry on, my hanky is for your tears.

When you need somebody to listen to you, we both know I’m all ears.

I would totally cross the ocean for you; but you couldn’t even jump a puddle for me.

As it is my time for a friend, I couldn’t help but think. 

I know that friendship should be unconditional—

but damn, it is so hard to just give and give until my all is none.

My all is given, my all has been taken for granted, my all is gone.

Call me selfish, call me a hypocrite.

But I’m out of here; I’m so done.

-fin-

(featured image courtesy of tumblr.com)