Escape

Day and night, I struggle

Stuck in one of the hardest battles of all.

One day I’m helpless

In a never ending labyrinth,

Looking for something I can’t even comprehend.

Trying to make sense of where to go;

But still not knowing what to look for.

Running like there is no end.

The next day I’m trapped

In a small cage with tiny holes,

Getting away from a ghost I don’t even recognise.

Trying to make sense of where to hide;

But still not knowing what I’m hiding from.

Seeing things with my own, two eyes.

Claustrophobia creeps into my veins as 

I look for that giant exit sign.

Tell me how does one escape 

When one gets lost in their own mind?

      
-fin-

(featured image courtesy: pinterest)

Used

You craved for my company,

You said it would just take time;

So I waited.

      
You promised me soon you will reciprocate my feelings,

Despite breaking my heart in the process many times;

So I stayed.

      
But truth is you just liked the idea that I love you,

You just enjoyed the feeling of being loved;

So I felt used.

      
But you didn’t love me back,

Nor would you ever do;

So I got tired.

      
You just used my love for you,

Until it was all gone;

So I left.

     
-fin-

     

(featured image courtesy: trunkweed.com)

Memory Lane

You’re in my thoughts again, I see,

Maybe it was really meant to be.

It’s hard to see you once again

Although I really can’t remember when.

I just know—

It was a long way down since we’ve seen each other;

And sad to say it wasn’t a pleasant encounter.

Because you keep on forcing me with things I don’t want to see.

With people I no longer trust, and places where I never wanted to be.

How would you expect us to last when you always bring me to the past? 

And expect me to move on from the people and places I’m trying to forget? 

How can I forget when all you make me do is reminisce? 

Yes, moving on is not forgetting you said;

But people cope differently, get it through your head. 

Again and again, we bicker whenever we see each other. 

And because I don’t want to linger, I won’t make this any longer. 

We won’t go any further even though I still can.

So I hope you understand that I can’t risk taking a trip again.

My memory lane, leave me be; 

‘Cause all you do is give me pain and melancholy.

-fin-

(photo courtesy of  tamsueva.com)

Hypnophobia

My mind wanders, leading me to a place where I feel completely wide awake with the eyes closed. These places where we go are supposed to be called ‘dreams’; a land of my great escape. But in my unconscious state, I become the most vulnerable as my mind takes me to a place called ‘nightmares’; they contain my worst miseries and fears.

 

So from then on, I control my mind. Never let it bring me to places again. When was the last time have I ever dreamt? I don’t know for I stopped going there. The dark is terrifying, but I teach my mind to get used to it. The night is mysterious, but wide awake, I can conquer it.

 

I am not afraid of the night. I am afraid of the demons that may haunt me once I close my eyes.

 

-fin-

(featured image courtesy: Literary Yard)

Chance

At first glance, breathing—

It was the last thing on my mind.

His eyes make diamonds envious

As they sparkle brighter,

Leaving a trail of girls after.

And his lips, once words flow,

There’s nothing, I know,

That I want to hear more.

Blessed in the gene department,

Everyone can see.

Just standing in the room

Makes girls weak on the knees.

Pathetic—now that is me.

I don’t even deny that

I am lost in my own reverie.

Because if to be noticed by him

Was a competition through lottery,

Count me in; I bet my all.

The psychotic girl stands tall.

Despite knowing that I have only

Chances that are one

In who-knows-how-many;

I won’t even deny,

I still hope on you, probability.     

-fin-

(featured image courtesy: MTV)

    

10.01.17

Similes of Depression and Anxiety

Like a physical pain, it hurts.

Every thought is a punch in the gut,

Every word is a stab straight to the heart.

Like a thief, it steals.

It took away the optimist in me.

Like a murderer, it kills.

Gone was the person I once used to be.

Like water, it flows.

From my mind, it goes

through my words and actions.

It’s drowning me.

Like a war, it’s a battle.

Either win to live or die trying.

I can’t do anything;

I’m sad to say I’m losing.

   

-fin-

(featured image courtesy: wdian.org)

Walking Oxymoron

my mind a controlled chaos,

my heart an organised mess

beautifully painful are my emotions

i arguably acquiesce.

with my naturally strange company,

you’ll learn to deal with what life brings;

like the sad joys and sweet agonies,

with all the huge little things.

typically weird sometimes.

awfully good at acting natural.

i like small crowds in order to be myself

somehow, it is weirdly normal.

i’ve never told a lie, i am a liar.

i always busy myself with nothing.

i care deeply for humanity but

oftentimes, i loathe human beings.

my past experiences make me burn in tears,

i drown at the fire brought by

the aftermath of my unpleasant years.

so to protect myself, 

i hate to love and love to hate.

just same differences, they create.

     

-fin-

     

(featured image courtesy: pinterest)